Im Not 12 Anymore

This morning, I had an interesting experience. My morning at work started off with a broke down doctor's toilet. Sherrie said it was my fault but truly...this time it wasn't. At any rate, she called the plumber to check things out.
On the way out, the plumber took a second to explain that it was a tank filling problem. While he was speaking, my mental roladex began turning. His face, although having a couple of decades of age on it that weren't there when I saw him last, was very familiar. I searched my mental files to remember where in the world I could have known him from. The first clue I had was that his name was Shannon. His uniform said as much. WOOHOOO Clue #1!!!
I asked him his last name. The name was very familiar. So began a barrage of questions that only a well seasoned fomer officer and daughter of Sue (who should have worked for the CIA with her 40 million questions) could have come up with. After just a couple of questions, I discovered that he was friends with my former neighbor in the neighborhood (the older brother of my playmate and former CRUSH) I grew up in. The craziest thing that came about was that once that connection was made, he said,"Are you Marci?"
WHY? HOW? WHAT? HOW did this guy remember my name? He was 6 years older than me. He didn't live in my neighborhood. He was friends with my neighbor who was 5 years older than me, was a football player, totally cool and incredibly hot (to me when I was a kid growing up). And suddenly I began to feel a little paranoid. Did he remember me as that goofy little kid next door that drooled and acted giddy everytime I was around my neighbor? Did they make fun of me...like "Hey _____ there's your girlfriend staring at you all coweyed!! AHAHAHHAHA" That would have been embarassing. When I was a kid and suffering through  my childish crush, I was nothing like the more sophisticated, glamour girls that my neighbor dated. I wore jeans and t-shirts practically every day of my life. I preferred to play touch football, war, soft ball, climb trees or play in the dirt to any other sort of girly activity. I didn't wear makeup...go figure! Pretty much, I haven't changed much in the last twenty something years.
As I stared at Shannon trying to recall exactly how he looked as a teenager, I told him that I remembered him as being so much taller than me. He said,"Well yea I seemed taller to you back when you were only 12!!!!" How funny! Of course he was taller than me back then! Now he is probably about 6 feet tall. Im right at 5' 8". Not only am I taller, I've had 2 kids, Ive got a few gray hairs, crows feet and boobs. None of which did I have back then. Shannon, had a few wrinkles, some gray hairs and lots of facial hair. I remember his hair being much more blonde back then too. Mine was too though...certainly not dark like it is now.
Suddenly when he began to recognize me, I felt some old feelings of insecurity that I used to feel when I was a kid and hanging around those older guys. I had to remind myself to hold it together...don't act goofy...talk like a grownup...don't be giddy.
I had to remind myself that I am a mature, smart, successful, HOT woman that has a great family and husband. No matter how goofy I was a kid....I was a great kid. I was still smart and cute. I was fun and just plain all right. As a woman, I am still the same...kind of goofy (some would argue, VERY GOOFY), smart, cute and all right (most of the time).
After Shannon left, I just had to laugh at myself. He told me that he was going to HAVE TO tell my old crush ( he didnt say OLD CRUSH) that he had run into me. He said that we should get together with all of the old neighbors (the crush, his younger sister and younger brother) and we could have a pillow fight. I told him that pillow fights take on a whole different meaning at our age. And I suppose that he is recalling a time when we did get into pillow fights. Maybe I vaguely remember that. I probably wouldn't have minded being tarred and feathered if my crush had been involved.
Did I disclose the fact that I had had a huge crush on my neighbor growing up? Not even the slightest little hint. Things like that being told to the grown objects of crushdom could make things very ackward. But I suspect that my crush probably had a pretty good clue that I was obsessed. Im sure he looked at me like I was just a silly child. The drool and goo goo eyes probably spoke volumes.