Trading RICHES

This weekend, Pete and I stayed close to home. The furthest we ventured out was to "town" or Athens as some other folk might refer to it (my neighbor laughs when I call going to Athens, TOWN..like its some great feat!) We had a couple of invitations to Central Georgia this weekend but we declined. I was afraid to get too far away and get caught off guard by this kidney stone that seems to be lurking around in my urinary tract.
While we were home on Saturday, we had the "opportunity" to see an episode of "Trading Spouses." So what you might think. Well in this particular episode, one of the couples was from Greenville, Georgia and the other from New York. The couple from Georgia lived in an old farm house with chickens, cows and various other farm creatures. The city folk, commonly referred to as Yankees in this Southern region that we live; lived in an apartment with a community gym, a swimming pool and had valet parking.
This Georgian couple had two little boys about the ages of approximately 8 and 10. They were rather rambunctious little boys. One spent a great deal of time whining like a girl. The oldest was what I would call, a brat. But the parents, they were just good ole COUNTRY folks. The father was the one that was to be traded. He evidently worked in a plywood mill. Life for them was very slow and dull. Just the way they liked it. The father had literally never been out of the town that he grew up in. He had never seen the beach. He had never been to Atlanta. He had never been ANYWHERE. Home was what he knew and loved.
Let me just add about these country people that they could not have been a more stereotypical "SOUTHERN" family. Their accents were thicker than mud. The poor father did not have all of his teeth. They were the kind of family that gets picked out of a crowd of 1000 people to report the UFO sighted or the tornado wreckage. BUT....I will say that they were good people. The husband, had a heart of gold. He was a very emotional sort, that got torn up over leaving his own family and then equally torn up over leaving his host family that he bonded with during the show. Understand that I am in NO WAY making fun of this man or his family. Its just the facts. This is how OUR media projected this SOUTHERN FAMILY.
And then there was the Yankee family. The Dad was a Jewish Lawyer. He talked loud. He was a big heavy guy. He loved his possessions. He prided himself on the fact that he had a fancy apartment, had a big law firm and had the largest beach house in the area. His wife, was very bossy and controlling. His children however, seemed well behaved but also not necessarily WANTING for anything. The whole family loved to live the big life. They always had their car parked by the valet. The wife was planning the Bar Mitzvah for her son Pierce. She said that those parties cost as much as a wedding. They were used to the BIG, busy life!
So whats my point you might ask? Did I write the whole story line down because I thought it was just an awesome show?! No.......
I am writing this because it had a big message in it. And the message wasnt that Lawyers from New York are obnoxious know it alls. No. Or that Southerners are made to look like idiots on tv. NO. Even though they were portrayed that way. But the message was this...
The whole idea behind the show was that each family got $50,000 for participating in the swap. And NO, I dont know how you can get signed up to send your spouse away for a week or two.
There was a big twist to this 2 hour long show. The fathers got to say how the other family spent the money. So the lawyer got to spend the plywood mill's worker's money and visa versa. Well, this wasnt about how the lawyer was very smart about paying off the Southern family's debts and helped them to remodel their dilapidated house. And it wasnt about how the Plywood Mill working father designated the money to go toward activities (like cooking lessons for the mother and father) to draw the family together so that they could bond. No, what I saw was the Jewish wife of a Lawyer who wanted to have her son's extremely expensive Bar Mitzvah payed for with the $50,000. She was hacked as our pastor at church would say. She demanded to be able to speak to a LAWYER!! Nevermind her husband was one. She felt like she got cheated out of her just desserts as a participant in the show.
In the end, the Southern dad and his family came out on top of the world. The Northern family, the mother in particular, acted as though the world had crashed down upon her. She commented that this other father just did not know what her financial needs were! Evidently living the big life, meant that someone was having to fork out some big payments. She needed that Bar Mitzvah payed for!! (But realize of course that this media wanted us to see the stereotypical IMAGE of this Northern family) The simple life seemed to win out on this show. And in life in general I think that's true.
I found a passage in the book of James that explains this whole show really well. James 4:13-17 says: "Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there , carry on business and make money." Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, "If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that." As it is, you boast and brag. All such boasting is evil. Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesnt do it, sins.
I am in NO WAY suggesting that people that have money are greedy sinners. I am not saying that poor people are righteous either. All I am saying is this: We all spend too much time worrying about tomorrow. Many of us tend to think that if we could just have this or that that life would be better and we could all just be happy. Many of us (yes even us Southerners) get caught up in having our gym memberships, our fancy new cars (or our fancy hybrids that save us lots of money on gas!!! 35mpg BABY!!!!), our big fancy houses, the nicest clothes and collections of rare whatevers. And I am as guilty as the next person. I may not have rare whatevers but I do love my car for its excellent gas mileage.
But what of this, that our lives are just mist that appears and vanishes? And how about the good that we ought to do and dont? Has there been that person or family sitting right in front of you that has been hurting or in need and maybe you have just chosen to look the other way? Why? Is it because you know that (or dont know) we could all be just one breath away from being in THAT person's very same position? Fear paralyzes us so often. The "WHAT IFs" eat us alive in our daily lives.
I told Pete today that there is a Christian family that we know that is really suffering right now due to mental illness. This mental illness is consuming their daily lives. And mental illness is not something that resolves itself overnight. Mental illness is a disease that destroys lives, families and communities. For many people that havent had to deal with a serious mental illness, they tend to joke about it or turn their backs to people/families that are dealing with it. Its not like a diagnosis of cancer. Most cancers you can see in xrays or on a CT scan. You can even touch cancerous tumors. You can often palpate tumors under the skin. You can see tumorous lesions on the skin. But mental illness... It lurks around, rearing its ugly head in the form of paranoia, irritability, worry, obsessive behavior. You cant put your hands on it. You dont always get to SEE it. You can see the pale skin and emaciated faces of those that stop eating because the very thought makes them sick. Or you can see the dark circles under their eyes or the bags that hang there from a lack of sleep. Maybe you might even catch a glimpse of the fear and angst that weighs the person down, in their eyes or in their very posture. But do you know that its mental illness? Do you turn your back because you dont know what to say or do to help? Or do you giggle thinking that this tormented souls behavior is just odd?
A friend of mine, has two children that she worries about every day. Because her children's father is bipolar, will her children suffer from mental illness too? Because I have depression and anxiety will my own children suffer from this very same problem? Can you imagine what a parent whose spouse has something like bipolar with mania or schizophrenia stays awake at night worrying about?
So, if you know anyone who is suffering, from a lack of food, welfare, sanity or peace, do what you know is good and right and try to help and avoid the avoidance that leads to sin. And Im not saying that we have to buy things for people. Im not saying that you have to give up your fancy smanchy car or the Coach purse. Im just saying that taking a minute to encourage someone, hug someone, PRAY for or with someone, laugh with someone or take someone a meal that needs it, can mean the difference between a person feeling alone, isolated, without anything, hungry or full of worry OR feeling blessed with a little bit of peace and love.