The Last Word

The LAST word
My mom used to say all the time when I was growing up that I really didnt HAVE TO HAVE the LAST WORD. I would talk myself into trouble because I just didnt know how to shut up. First let me say that my oldest child has this very same disorder. And I fear that my second child might have inherited this gene as well, but time will have to tell.
Only until recently...oh say the last 10 years or so did I start taking on a new way of thinking. I do not recall MY mom ever really saying this but I know someone's mom said it at some point in time: If you dont have anything nice to say then just dont say anything at all!! So, I find that because I have been accused of being BRUTALLY HONEST at times, (COLD HEARTED TOO) that I just keep my mouth shut unless I am asked a pointed question. WHEW MAN...then isnt that a trap?!. I try to forewarn people by saying "ARE YOU SURE you really want to KNOW???"
I used to work with a gentleman that suffered from being bi-polar. Unfortunately he had wanted to be promoted to being a sergeant. (Yes I was really in law enforcement. Dont let my sweet, loving nature fool you.I am a stickler for WHATS RIGHT) Now, he had spent about 6 months prior saying that he in no way wanted to be in management because all he was looking forward to in his job was retiring. Well, one dreaded day, this "friend"of ours asked me what I thought about him becoming a supervisor. Well friends, lets just say that he THOUGHT he wanted to "GO THERE" but then could not accept the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth according to Marci. Yea...that didnt go so well. I told him that I thought he was actually pretty flippant about the whole idea and that I did not think that someone should supervise others that does not have our officer's best interest and safety in mind first. His chest puffed up and he called me an "ASSHOLE." WOW...Did I happen to mention that this fella married me and my husband? Yea...That didnt go very well.
Then there has been numerous situations since then. My deputy director said one time that I had a problem communicating with others..I didnt know how to "sugar coat" things very well. But he said that he appreciated my directness. Im really not one of those people that says things to just hurt others. I would rather take a blow than serve one. Being honest is a hard thing to do. Delivering the truth can be very painful. No everyone likes the truth. But I would rather someone be honest and have that sting for a moment than have some one lie to me, serve me a fake smile and follow it with a "bless your heart!" But the "truth" that you serve up better be more than just a weak opinion based on flimsy feelings you may have at the moment. It better be served after much thought on the subject lest you say something that you might regret later and just spat it out in the heat of the moment!
Speaking of truth, as I was riding home from work tonight, I was listening to 90.9 Toccoa Radio just like I always do on the way to my domicile. I need that time to unwind and find a bit of peace after a hectic day. I find great comfort in hearing God's word. And strangely enough, the speaker always seems to be discussing a topic that applies to me in some way.
Tonight, this fella was talking about the MEDIA. He was saying that if we were to tune into our bibles like we tune into the messages that are fed to us from the tv, what a great state of spirituality we would be in. He was bold enough to suggest that we give tv up for one week and actually read a book instead. He said that we dont have to read the Bible but maybe just a book that we might find some benefit in reading. Ive been reading a book by Joyce Meyer. If I wasnt on this dog gone computer right now, I would be reading! :) Anyway, he said that after the first couple of days we might not miss tv much and might not really benefit from fasting from it. However, after about day 4-5 we might start to notice the loss. But imagine the gain we would have if we sat down and read Gods word or some other spiritually stimulating book?! I was very intrigued by the whole concept. I rarely watch tv. Instead, you would likely find me surfing Craigslist or Ebay for some really cool pieces of furniture or clothing. Maybe I might be searching for a job or house for someone else. Or I might be posting little comments here and there on MYSPACE...whatever... Can I go 7 days without EMAIL or MYSPACE?? AND 7 days without CRAIGSLIST?? Holy Toledo!
So anyway the moral of this story is this: Dont come to me unless you want to hear the truth according to me. If you do end up asking my opinion and dont like what I have to say, dont be offended if I write about you in MYSPACE...I will be kind enough to leave your name out....but I HAVE TO HAVE THE LAST WORD! :) Well, ok, maybe not anymore...Ill just go surf Craigslist or actually READ my book!